The Center for Relationship

Training and Recovery

 

Michael H. Borash, LPC, P.C. and Associates

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A Group for Adults

 

Overcoming a Difficult Childhood

 

 

 

Relational Parenting

We are very excited to be offering our new Relational Parenting program.  The program synthesizes the Bowlby-Ainsworth research on early childhood attachment and adaptations to parenting styles, developmental theories of emotional growth, recent and relevant research on childhood inter-personal neurobiology, the Bowenian concept of self-differentiation and the relationship dialogue model developed by Harville Hendrix and utilized by Imago Therapists and workshop presenters worldwide The concepts and skills are presented in a lively and understandable format.

The program is presented in 10 weekly two hour modules.  The first hour is educational and the second hour is skill building practice with a partner.  While the modules are sequential, they are also independent allowing people to enter the program at any time.   

 

Week 1 content:  

                       First hour:   Birth to 15 months.   Attachment.   

                       Second hour:  Communication tools – what are they??

                                                  Learning to listen – the mirror and the parking garage:  demonstration

                                                  Practicing the listening skill in dyads

 

Week 2 content:

                     First hour:  15 months to 30 months.   Exploration & limit setting

                     Second hour:  Communication tools – the I and the Thou?

                                                 Learning to listen with understanding - demonstration

                                                 Practicing the listening and validation tools

 

Week 3 content:

                     First hour:  30 months to 44 months.  Identity Formation

                     Second hour:  Communication tools – What is empathy really?

                                                 Learning to listen with empathy - demonstration

                                                 Practice listening & mirroring child identifications

Week 4 content:

                  First hour:  44 months to 72 months.    Competence

                   Second hour:  Communication tools – Conscious parenting

                                                  The parent – child dialogue - demonstration

                                                   Practice listening and mirroring competence

 

Week 5 content:

                 First hour:  Yrs. 7 to 12.     Care and concern

                     Second hour:  Communication tools – listening with interest

                                                  Getting beyond the chapter title

                                                   Practice listening to provocative content

 

Week 6 content:

                 First hour:  Yrs. 12 to 20.    Intimacy

                      Second hour:  Communication tools – sender responsibility

                                                Practice sending in a way other can hear it

 

Week 7 content:  

              First hour:   Yrs. 20 to 26   Young adulthood

              Second hour:  Adult to adult dialogue

 

Week 8 Content:

              First hour:   A closer look at judgement, criticism and praise

              Second hour:  Practice containment and impulse control

 

Week 9 content:

              First hour:   Becoming more conscious of our buttons

              Second hour:  Dyads, share a button and mirror a button

Week 10 content

               First hour:  Phenomenology – an objective look at subjectivity

              Second hour:  Listening with curiosity

 

Program cost:  

                         $30  PER MODULE PER INDIVIDUAL

                         $45 PER MODULE PER COUPLE

                        Sign up for all ten modules and receive a discount:

 

                        $260 for ten modules for individuals

                        $400 for ten modules for couples

 

 

 

 

The Center for Relationship Training and Recovery is offering a weekly small group experience for adults continuing to experience the consequences of a difficult childhood.

 

A difficult childhood experience was, is and will be a reality for many people.  Undeniably there are many advantages to being born into a secure, stable and loving home environment.  Parents, secure in their identity, committed to their relationship and ready to be parents would seem to present a fertile environment for a baby to grow physically, develop intellectually and mature emotionally.  Consistent availability, warmth, attunement and mirroring are great relationship skills for parents to possess.  

 

We know, however, that many of us grow up without ideal parenting.  We survive.  Children learn how to survive less than ideal home situations.  One parent families, depressed parents, drug addicted or alcoholic parents, bi-polar parents, unhappy parents, abusive parents, raging parents, preoccupied parents, frequently absent parents, suffering parents will all produce protective adaptations in their children.   Some kids will become over achievers, maybe even perfectionists.  Some will frequently get into trouble drawing an exceedingly large amount of negative attention.  Some will withdraw into a shell, perhaps a bit like a turtle, trying to stay out of harm’s way.  Some   may become jokesters and little comedians trying to make everyone laugh or at least smile.  Some may become parents to their parents sensing the pain of the parent and trying to help.  Some may become very tough, willing to fight and manipulate, insulating themselves from the emotional experience of others.  Still others might become quite independent learning to soothe themselves and not rely on others.

 

All adaptations are understandable in the context from which they arose.  They were functional responses to childhood situations and an individual’s childhood reality.  The problem(s) that tend to arise in adolescence and adulthood have more to do with what wasn’t learned in the childhood home.  Preparation for adult relationships begins in the family of origin.  Poor communication styles within a family limit a child’s experience of safety, intimacy and transparency as well as being seen and understood.   A failure or inability to discuss issues, problems, decisions and consequences don’t prepare a child for a partnership relationship.  Collaboration, mirroring, validation, consensus building and empathy are important tools in building a good relationship.   They can be learned.

 

The purpose of this group is to provide the environment necessary for growth in relationship to occur.   Group members will have the opportunity to discuss current life circumstances as well as family of origin issues.  Tools to help group members listen to others with interest, curiosity and understanding are practiced.  The group becomes a learning laboratory with regard to the nature and nurture of relationships.  It also serves to afford its members the experience of intimacy as a gradual process of trust building characterized by consistency, predictability and familiarity .

 

This group will also support any work being doing in marriage/relationship counseling.  

 

Locations:  

 

The Center for Relationship Training & Recovery

 

13885 Hedgewood Drive, Suite 349,  Woodbridge, VA 22193, 800-799-1212

or

9853 Business Way, Manassas, VA 20110, 800-799-1212

 

Commitment:  

 

Prospective group members are asked to make a six month minimum commitment to weekly group attendance.   

 

It starts with a 90 minute individual intake, orientation and goal setting session.   We’ll   insure that this type of a group experience is the right place for you.  

 

Costs:

 

$45 per weekly 2 hour group session.  

 

$150 for 90 minute individual intake session.  

 

 

For more information: click here for information request form